Sail the Universe
by Bhryn Astairre
Summary: ME1 - Shepard loved the stars, they were always there for her. Now she had a new course, somewhere among them but she never expected the events that followed... Part 1 of a Trilogy.
1. Prologue

_(Note: I don't remember ALL the conversation choices I made exactly, so, forgive me - call it artistic liberty! xx)_

-** Sail the Universe -  
Prologue**

* * *

She turned the book over between her hands, staring out across the sharp spires of the city with a distant look in her dark eyes. Briefly, and only briefly, did she allow herself to glance upwards at the dark net of stars, blinking quietly away to themselves in usual fashion. Somewhere out there, would be parties and celebrations for things no one had any knowledge about. Even here, they went about life without thinking or looking, their eyes glazed with the neon lights and lips parting as if to laugh or even shout.

Her eyes skipped down to the cover of the heavy tome she held. Collected Poems of Lord Alfred Tennyson. She wasn't ever much of one for poetry, but she could never resist a well turned phrase. It was a habit that had stayed with her when she became a Commander, as she worked her way slowly through the ranks of N7 and towards her goal of having her own ship someday. It was only natural to idealise it, both of her parents had been Navy and she had grown up among brats in the same circumstances as she. There were no gardens of flowers, or smoggy alleyways when she had been a child; there had been duty, obligation and a strict upright code. She had grown up wanting to be in the Alliance Navy, wanting what her parents and friends had. It was only natural.

"Sometimes, I think they happily just want to ignore whatever is being said to them."

She glanced sidelong at the Turian standing next to her, most of his usually inexpressive face covered in a large white print of tribal marking. Whilst she didn't mind alien races, she had grown up with parents and family who had fought in the first contact war. It was a little hard to shake off that feeling around Nihilus, given how strict he was.

"Who is that?"

"The Council, but it's nothing that should concern you. We got some orders through and it happens to be on another of your usual routes." Nihilus handed the datapad to her. "Eden Prime."

Shepard said nothing. The Turian was a Spectre and had spent most of his time on their ship lately. She was under the command of Anderson, a well respected officer and someone she admired greatly. Anderson had been close friends with her father. After a Terminus turf war had seen Alliance science ships getting stranded in combat, the last she had of him was a badly grained datafeed.

She often wondered if that was why Anderson had requested her on his ship; to look out for her or maybe to remember the father that she barely could, a father she was always told she took after in personality. "We're gonna need more of your food then," she muttered.

"I'm in your debt."

Whilst his face betrayed little, the tone was there, a hint of amusement. She almost smiled in spite of herself. So that's how it was, more wry and dry, than outright sarcasm. The more time she spent around Turians, the more she could see how alike their races could be. "Alright," she tapped fingers on the pad to order the food stores in, "But you're gonna have to do without your little luxuries."

"I think my figure would thank you."

"I think your heart might more, I saw how some of those were prepared. Ugh."

"It aids digestion."

Shepard merely quirked one of her platinum eyebrows, "Sure. That I can believe, I sure don't think much can fix the taste."

This time is was Nihilus who moved his facial plates a little, reminiscent of a smile and a friendly one at that. It was that moment that she decided to go ahead and like the odd Spectre. They stood there together for some time, bantering back and forth about food supplies, about places they'd been and about the news feed that had some usual galactic trouble brewing out in the Terminus systems. She commented with some disdain about Batarians, it was something that even now she had difficulty stopping herself from doing; her parents had taught her to be open minded. But the mention of their name brought back memories she'd rather have stuffed down, of a grainy picture and her fathers distorted voice. It made her think of Elysium...

After a while Nihilus left to go and check on his gear and make sure his papers were in order. He might be a Spectre but he seemed one of those that enjoyed rules and paperwork. Just like a Turian to keep everything in shape.

Her eyes kept moving to the sky, to the stars.

They seemed very far away but if she squinted and held up her hand, surely she could catch them between her fingers. Her arm lifted without volition and only as she was beginning to squeeze her eyes shut did she realise what she was doing and snapped it back down to her side furiously, cheeks turning a blush rose. "I'm not a kid any more," she huffed to the air about her, as if it would care.

The office was empty of people and without them, it seemed somehow too clinical, too alien. It wasn't like the places she was used to. She'd once visited Earth with her mother, Hannah. There'd been old mansions with warm sitting rooms, offices and dining halls so large she could imagine through the eyes of a child how wonderful it must have been to live there, how many wonderful things must have happened. If she went back now, she wouldn't see any of those things. She would miss the starry map of the universe, she'd miss the sights and smells of space ports, the sound of the mass effect engine throbbing as the ship wound a way through nebulae and gravity fields. She wasn't meant to live on the solid ground.

_No, I'm no longer a child with a million questions and no answers. I'm an adult, looking for a way in this life. The questions haven't grown any less but the answers are finally coming to me. Anderson and the Normandy are the life I know right now, it's something I'm very proud of. So stop worrying... just stop._

The call was coming in before she was even aware of hearing it, so she lifted her left arm and tapped through her code, "Hello? Yes, yes I made the arrangements for it. Pick up the extra supplies from cargo bay 23. Yes, we can always bunk him in down by the battery, there's some spare rooms there. No, I'll come right away. Tell Captain Anderson I won't be long. Alright, thank you."

The omnitool glow faded and she looked back, only once at the sky and made a grab at the stars, feeling at once foolish and giddy. Then she laughed, "Not a child, Commander Shepard."


	2. Eden Prime

**- Sail the Universe -**

_So many worlds, so much to do, so little done, such things to be.  
Lord Alfred Tennyson_

**1: Eden Prime**

* * *

Joker jerked his hands about, making a stiff expression then glanced over his shoulder at her with large and almost accusing eyes. He was about her age, but it seemed as if the ace pilot loved to cling to his humorous nature, especially when he found himself in situations he didn't like. She knew it was only to try and keep some levity at harder times, to keep stress and depression at bay but still...

To the right, in the co-pilot seat was Kaidan Alenko. He offered Joker a concilliatory look and a shrug of broad shoulders, "Hey come on, Anderson has a good reason for this."

"Oh sure he does, what do you think?" Joker directed this one at her, and Shepard grimaced.

Why did they always try and redirect the flow of a conversation back to her? "Well, I can't say either really. I know he wouldn't do anything unless he thought it was for the best, so how about we just try and wait, it might be good to be patient for a change."

"Yeah, patient," the pilot gnawed his teeth around the word, "sure thing. But what about that Nihilus..."

"He's a Spectre," she helplessly shrugged.

"And a Turian," Alenko added thoughtfully, "But there obviously must be something going on, if he's aboard."

"Mmm and come to think of it, he's been aboard a lot lately."

Two sets of eyes bored into her accusingly. Shepard sighed, feeling worn out, "I don't know anything guys, and how about you do some work instead of playing interrogator? I know this ship doesn't just fly itself."

She turned to go, feeling her cheeks burn; like she had any more of an idea than these guys did about Nihilus, she just didn't feel the overwhelming curiosity that the others did. She did however catch Joker getting the last word in, like he always needed to, "It has auto pilot."

Ugh, if she could have slammed an automatic door shut, she would have without a shadow of a doubt. Instead she let it slide quietly closed behind her and massaged her fingertips into her temples. Sure, being Anderson's second in command was fantastic, it came with good privileges and pay and it would stand her in excellent stead for her N7 training but he really had a habit of picking eccentrically brilliant people. Joker was a great guy, but sometimes he really knew how to dig into her skin, and Alenko was all smiles, even when serious.

Feeling every second of her age, she walked through the deck towards the Galaxy map, nodding to Pressly when he caught her eye. Oh, clearly he wanted something too, so she slowed herself down and turned to him. "Pressly," she said, nodding to him.

"Commander," he nodded back, datapad in hand. "I see we have Nihilus on board again. Is this all right? Having aliens aboard the Normandy, I mean, she's the best in our fleet."

"And she was made by Turian design," she gently reminded him, "I'm sure we have little stuff that they haven't already seen before."

"Yes, perhaps, but I'm starting to get nervous about this."

"Who isn't, seems like everyone is on edge these days." Shepard reached out and patted his arm, Pressly was one of the older naval types, he remembered the harder times. "Hey, we all have to work together. When we joined..."

"I know, I know I just... acceptance is harder the older you get."

"If I find anything out, I'll let you know Pressly," she smiled.

He smiled back, she had that effect on people. "Thanks Commander."

With another nod for him, she glanced through the holographic galaxy map then almost knocked directly into the man blocking the route towards the command deck. "Sorry about that," she said, before she recognised Jenkins and then dimly, the serving medical Tech, Doctor Chakwas (or Hacksaw, as her patients usually called her, for her rough and frontier way of dealing with injured in wartime). "Ah, what are you guys hanging around for?"

"Commander," Jenkins flushed, "I well, we were talking about..."

"Oh great," she sighed, putting a hand to her face, "Let me guess, about Nihilus. Everyone else is talking about him so why should you be any exception. Look, he's here for now so lets just try and get along around him as much as we can. Doctor, can I get some extra medigel, I think I have a bruiser of a headache forming."

"Of course," Chakwas neatly levered Jenkins aside; for all the age her greying hair suggested, she was nimble and strong. "You don't want to keep Anderson or Nihilus waiting Commander. Come on Jenkins."

"But I..."

Shepard watched them both walk away; despite how it was definitely the good doctor doing the manhandling of the raw new recruit Jenkins. She nearly laughed a little. Jenkins reminded her of some of her other basic training buddies, they'd been so anxious to get out and do some action. If she'd had a brother, she could imagine it being someone like him. It's a shame her parents never got around to it.

Taking a breath in, she went around the corner and through the doors to where Nihilus was waiting for her, in the middle of the large platform with a black screen hanging behind him, past the holo generators. He wore his imposing armour like a second skin and for a moment she hesitated, wondering what he was looking at on the pad in his hands.

"Shepard," his gravelly voice greeted her and she shook her head slightly, trying to clear out the cobwebs.

"Nihilus," she responded, as best she could. With a purposefully measured stride, she took a place next to him. "So, going to tell me what all this is about?"

"I suppose you may as well know, I have been sent here to oversee you."

She couldn't help it, she gave him one of her hardest looks. The Turian didn't so much as bat an eyelid or twitch a facial plate. "Oversee me for what?"

"Spectre candidacy. As you know, humans are the newest race allowed into the polity and well, we're looking into your races special and superior qualities, and you've been suggested as a candidate for the Spectre programme."

Shepard stopped her mouth from falling open, instead continuing to glare furiously at him as he idly tapped away on the pad screen. This was complete and utter lunacy. She was a Commander, she was N7; why would they ask her to undertake such a stupid venture as far as going into the Spectre programme was concerned. She wasn't even sure she'd be the right candidate for it... sure she'd gotten that medal and everyone treated her like some kind of war hero but all she'd done was...

"Shepard, I see Nihilus has told you the reason he's here."

She turned to glance behind her at the man wearing the Captain's uniform. Stocky and about her height, Anderson was a man that Shepard greatly looked up to. In the absence of her father he had been the rock where she had wept many times as a teenager and during her tenure as a private. It was Anderson who had coached her on policy, on tactics and on mental strength. Looking at his blocky face, marked with scars but with kind brown eyes and a mouth that could give her the proudest smile; she felt comforted, usually.

Now wasn't one of those times however, so she respectfully folded her hands behind her back, " Sir" she acknowledged.

"Don't look at me like that Shepard, the Spectre programme is one of great standing, and a great honour for humanity. You would be the first human Spectre," Anderson's hand on her shoulder was a heavy weight.

Nihilus chipped in, hardly seeming to notice the byplay of emotions; "It's a heavy honour too. The candidate for humanity must be one that can be seen to be upright at all costs."

"Upright, right, I get it." She sighed, Elysium. "And Eden Prime?"

"We've had reports of unusual activity on the colony there."

"Isn't Eden Prime a garden world, farmers and stuff, not much there."

Anderson nodded, "True but, if there were anything we could deal with it, and it gives Nihilus a chance to observe you in action-"

"Captain!" It was Joker's voice, cutting through their conversation easily. "We've received a distress call from Eden Prime!"

"Eden Prime? Put it on the screen, Joker."

"Aye aye, Captain."

They turned their faces to the screen, but as the picture began to clarify cold dread hit her blood stream running. The scene was one of complete chaos. Blood, smoke, images of frightening machines darkening the sky. There were screams and people running, people dying. The voice of the person on the call was one she could barely make out, one she didn't want to make out. The images were enough for her.

"Could it be.. Geth?"

Shepard looked up at Nihilus, who was rubbing his jawline in something close to agitation. "Geth? But they never come outside of the Perseus Veil."

"Looks to me like they just did," Anderson frowned then sighed, "Okay, we have to respond immediately. Commander," she snapped to attention, "Get suited and booted. Give Alenko and Jenkins orders to assemble with you."

"Sir!"

He looked at the screen, the image frozen on the picture of the Geth drop ship. "And let us hope we're not too late."

* * *

"I'll move faster on my own, so I'll scout ahead."

No one could stop him. Nihilus charged off the open belly of the Normandy. He was gone from sight within moments. Shepard watched him vanish, then turned her attention back towards Jenkins and Alenko. Despite how giddy Jenkins seemed he was intent now, and Alenko had the grim look of a man about to face the worst. She nodded to Anderson, "Alright, we'll follow behind and check for survivors."

"If you meet resistance from hostiles," Anderson began but she smiled at him.

"I know, Sir."

"Good luck, Commander."

They hurried off the Normandy as quickly as they could. She was aware of her squad capabilities thankfully. Jenkins was a soldier born and bred, but Alenko, like herself, was biotic. She knew he was handy with barriers, but she... well.

As they scouted through the long grass and around chunks of exploded stone, the Normandy was back again, high among the clouds and listening to their radio chatter, trying to find survivors to escort them off planet. Something caught her eye, and she stared at it a moment. "What is that?"

"Gas plants, or rather, Gas Bags, they're harmless Commander."

She gave Alenko a wry smile, "Interested in plants?"

"Not so much, just know a lot of useless crap."

"Mmm," she replied, then motioned them to follow her around a tall outcropping. They crept up towards it, just in time to see another drop ship fly in close by. She pushed her squad down with hands on their helmets, glaring through her visor at the ship as it grazed the horizon and passed out of view. "Wonder what they're doing here, come on..."

They made to move about the corner, Jenkins on point when suddenly there was a shout. Out of nowhere a barrage of turret fire and Jenkins arched back, reaching for the sky. Then in a second, he was laid back on the floor, still. "GET DOWN!" she screamed at Alenko, pushing him backwards without a single thought. Landing atop him, and leaving him winded, she reached behind her for the shotgun at her waist level.

"Commander, machines!"

"I know," she snarled, "For Jenkins!"

She charged out of the cover, leaving Alenko blinking owl-like after her. She made it into short range and shot the closest target, turning on the next one and punching it so hard that her hand went through the frame of machine, pulling out wires and circuit chips. Alenko finished the other off, it went flying over the edge of the cliff. Huffing, Shepard turned back around to see that Alenko had already begun to arrange Jenkins' body, so she hurried back to him.

"Sorry, Commander, he deserved better... he..."

She placed her hand on his shoulder, trying to pitch her voice as soothing, "No.. don't worry. We'll get him the funeral he deserves after we finish this mission."

"As you say... thank you."

She nearly reprimanded him.

Jenkins had been a squad mate, however brief that may have been. Images of her old comrades burned through her mind and her fingers tightened a little against Alenko's shoulder, but as soon as she did, she let go and began hurrying along the pathway. He said nothing, but he didn't have to. She knew she was weak, sometimes. Weak and kind of silly.

"_What are you doing!"_

What was she doing? Shepard sighed and continued to pick her way down the slope that tapered around the ruins, fighting past a few more mobile turrets and one Gas Bag that seemed to grow attached to her, following alongside her until a branch got in its path. She scavenged what she could find. A combat sensor from a dropped soldier and thankfully some medigel, that she applied to her hurting knuckles.

Eden Prime had been a beautiful garden world – a small colony world, with agriculture as it's main industry. Now, as she leaped over rubble, she regretted that she had never been here before. It was as she came around the corner that she saw a woman running for her life in pink and white armour. She screamed out and dove behind another chunk of rock as bullet spray hit where she'd been standing.

"Alenko, hurry," she called back to the man who was coming after, "Barrier her up and get them!"

"Aye aye," he replied.

She circled around to the other side, ducking quickly but not before a bullet ricocheted off her helmet bridge, sending her head snapping backwards. "Argh!"

The Geth advanced to where she was, the other more interested in the woman and Alenko. She had never fought a Geth before and was unused to the idea of machines having the level of spatial awareness she was seeing here. It was almost as if it had sensed her as a danger. It stopped by the small low joist and she jumped up from behind it, grabbing it by the hands and grappling the weapon from it. Once it was freed, she then turned and drove her shoulder into the Geth's chest. In a human, it would wind them, but this was a machine so it merely stumbled a little. Hurrying, she twirled back around and unloaded three shotgun shells into it, checking the thermal temperature on the weapon as the Geth collapsed onto the grass.

_This make overheats too quickly, I need a new weapon. What a pain._

"Commander," she looked up, to see the woman stood close by her. "Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams, 2nd Frontier Division."

"Commander Shepard of the SS Normandy, what did you find, Williams?"

"Machines, ma'am, people being... killed and turned into monsters. My own squad," Behind the helmet visor, she could see those dark brown eyes tighten in pain. "Good men and woman, ma'am."

"Always are, Williams."

"Ma'am."

Shepard liked her instantly. She couldn't say why; perhaps it was the sense of stern military from her. Her mother was like that, all business. She wasn't too much of a people person, like her father had been. Williams made her think of home, made her think of a woman she didn't connect with too much, not as much as she should. "You're alive Williams, and we have some Geth to put down."

"Ma'am," the relief was evident, strong and palpable in the gunnery's voice, "I'm with you."

"Good to have you aboard, Chief." The two women shared a smile.

* * *

Nihilus got up from kneeling on the floor, from examining the traces of passage. He'd always been skilled in stealth and tracking. He supposed it was what had gotten him this far. He holstered his weapon and looked about.

"Nihilus," it was a familiar voice and one that made him jump.

"Saren," he said with relief upon seeing the familiar Spectre and fellow Turian, his long time close friend. "It's good to see you."

"I caught wind of something, as I was passing through so I came to help," the taller Turian's voice was smooth and cool, as always. His eyes, a unique blue as they had been of late, looked around at the devastation, "It seems like I was too late."

"Maybe not," Nihilus said, holding up shards of material, "I was checking into matters out here and I think that this Geth attacked was not unplanned. I think they're here for some kind of Prothean data."

"I see, anything else you know?" Saren asked, walking past him.

"No," he replied.

"Told anyone yet?"

Nihilus shook his head, fingers absently working on the omni tool, "Not yet, I'm still working on my theory. Saren, it's so good to have you here, I feel comfortable just knowing you are. An old set of eyes to watch my back, like old times."

"Yes," Saren agreed, placing his gun to the back to Nihilus' head. "Just like old times."

A sharp retort. Blood. And then, nothing.


End file.
